Kathleen Gerard, author and my friend, has a funny and entertaining short story “Last Licks” featured in a new anthology THE KILLER WORE CRANBERRY, a book of humorous mystery stories centered around Thanksgiving.  Her story is only available online at a price of $1.50 (info below).  Order it today for a quick, fun read!

Story synopsis:

My fourth AUSA family forum story:

10/27/2010

Gen. George W. Casey, Jr., Army chief of staff, and his wife Sheila honored military family survivors at the fourth military family forum of the Association of the United States Army’s Annual Meeting and Exposition on Oct. 27.

“You need to know that your loved one’s sacrifice is recognized and appreciated and won’t be forgotten,” said Gen. Casey.

Two years ago, the Caseys initiated Survivor Outreach Services (SOS) when they discovered that the Army was not doing enough to take care of survivors, many of whom felt the Army was their home and wanted to stay connected.  Gen. Casey said they have tried to build a program that has enough Army structure to help, but flexible enough to meet survivors’ individual needs.  At the founding of SOS, he created a panel of survivors to advise him on the difficulties that they face, and the panel continues to meet and offer suggestions and input.

Many survivors attended the forum and used the opportunity to express gratitude for SOS, and also to question the Caseys about topics of concern, including suicide among both soldiers and spouses, benefits for survivors and the overall need for more survivor assistance.

“You’ve got a voice,” Mrs. Casey said.  “Let us help you make that voice heard.”

Maj. Gen. Reuben D. Jones, commanding general of family and morale, welfare and recreation, extended the discussion of SOS.  He said that the program aims to embrace and reassure survivors that the Army will always be there for them.  He introduced a new SOS pin, logo and decal.  The decal, labeled with the fallen soldier’s serial number, is designed to reduce bureaucratic friction for survivors and make it easier for them to get into installations.

Col. Robert F. McLaughlin, Fort Carson garrison commander, spoke about the fort’s newly opened Fallen Heroes Family Center.  He said that the center embodies a passion and purpose to help survivors, involves community partners and offers a place to gather and connect.  The center provides emotional counseling, financial training, support groups for Gold Star fathers and male spouses, and mentoring for youth.

Cynthia A. Jones, legislative assistant on military, foreign and veterans’ affairs to Senator Mary Landrieu, D=La., encouraged survivors to educate their legislators about military issues.  She said that most lawmakers are unaware that the word “family” in benefits legislation does not include survivors.  Her contact info is Cynthia_jones@landrieu.senate.gov

The forum concluded with a presentation on understanding military loss given by Jill Harrington LaMorie, director of professional education and training for Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS), and Joanne M. Steen, founder of Grief Solutions and co-author of “Military Widow:  A Survival Guide.”

Military deaths are often unexpected and sudden, occur in distant places and involve trauma or violence, LaMorie said.  The soldier’s bodily remains may not be intact or recoverable. Military deaths can also occur after a long separation from the soldier’s family; there may be multiple deaths in a command or unit, and there may be distracting media coverage. The death notification process itself may also be traumatic for survivors. Moreover, most soldiers are young, and they leave behind young families that are often ill-equipped developmentally to deal with death. All of these factors make grieving difficult for loved ones.

Steen said survivors need to accept the reality of the loss, work through the pain, acquaint themselves with a new normal and, eventually, choose to reinvest in life.  When survivors examine the unanswerable whys, she said, they do not find closure, but they ultimately find peace of mind by accepting the reality of the event, learning to live happily in the present and looking forward to the future.

Susan M. Sipprelle

My third story from the AUSA convention:

10/27/2010

My second story from the annual AUSA convention:

Thomas R. Lamont, assistant secretary of the Army, set the context for the second military family forum focused on the children of military families at the Association of the United States Army’s Annual Meeting and Exposition.

“It is our responsibility to take good care of military families,” he said Oct. 26 and added that the $8.8 billion budget for family support will increase by 3 percent in the upcoming year.

Nine years of continuous war have not been easy, Lamont said, and have produced the signature issues of suicide, post-traumatic stress disorder and traumatic brain injury.  There are 524,000 soldiers deployed who have children, and 45 percent of these parents have been deployed at least twice. Over 142,000 children are dealing with the absence of a deployed parent.

The Army is examining:  How are the children of military families faring?  Is their resiliency growing or eroding?

This forum convened a panel of experts on children and adolescents to discuss these questions as well as the military’s programs aimed at helping children cope with the effects of deployment.

Richard M. Lerner, director of the Tufts University institute for applied research in youth development, cited the results of a large scale, longitudinal study of 4-H participants.  The study shows that adolescents participating in 4-H programs are more engaged in their schoolwork and communities and less likely to smoke, drink alcohol or take drugs than their peers who are not part of the program.  Since approximately 85,000 military children are 4-H members, Lerner said that study indicates the potential for positive youth development that is fostered in supportive environments.

Children whose parents have been deployed 19 months or more cumulatively since 2001 have modestly lower, yet statistically significant, achievement scores, reported Amy Richardson, a policy researcher for Rand Corporation.  She found that teachers, advisors and counselors want more information about deployments and about how to help children and families who are struggling with their effects.

Richardson recommended that Army improve the flow of information to schools, continue to build its psychological and behavioral health capacity, provide greater access to lower-cost mental health care and work to integrate behavioral and primary care. For more on her research, email amy_richardson@rand.org

Angela Huebner, associate professor of human development at Virginia Tech, discussed her findings on how teenagers adjust to their parents’ deployment, gathered from adolescent focus groups.  Unsurprisingly, deployment is stressful for both young people and their parents. 

Huebner advised parents to make time for family discussions about the difficult issues surrounding deployments and reintegration, to maintain consistent expectations and rituals, to access support systems and to learn and model appropriate strategies for self care and coping.  She recommended Scream Free Parenting and the book, “Parenting from the Inside Out” by Dr. Dan Siegel as resources.

The most common response that humans exhibit in response to challenge is resilience, Shelley M. MacDermid Wadsworth, professor of child development and family studies at Purdue University, reminded the forum audience.  But she said that there is mounting evidence that a substantial minority of military children show elevated anxiety and lower school achievement.

Wadsworth suggested that parents refer to Sesame Workshop’s Talk, Listen, Connect as a model to help deal with the negative emotions evoked by deployments.  She also alerted the audience members to a new program for military families with very young children that will be available soon at 65 installations – Zero to Three:  Coming Together Around Military Families.

Shirley A. Young, program manager for Child, Youth and School Services described the Army Reserves’ Backpack Journalist program that she said helps address the issues raised by the panel’s researchers.  Youths who take part in the program learn about photojournalism, songwriting, poetry, cartooning and filmmaking.  They gain useful skills and stay connected during their parents’ deployment.

Kathleen Y. Marin, director of installation services in the office of the assistant chief of staff for installation management, summarized the Army’s efforts to combat the ill effects of deployments on children.  She reported that the 2010 Blue Star Survey of Military Family Life found that 66 percent of families confirmed that schools are responding to their children’s needs, 33 percent are seeking counseling and 71 percent want more help during deployments.

Marin briefly listed some of the assistance that is currently available to military families: Parents can turn to respite care that is available before, during and after deployments.  Hours have also been extended at military childcare centers.  Army Strong Beginnings Pre-K is operational at over 80 garrisons.  Families can receive up to $100 reduced sports fees for their children during deployments.  Tutor.com offers free 24/7 tutoring for military families.  Operation:  Military Kids and Operation: Military Child Care provide support to geographically dispersed families.  And Operation Give a Hug continues to send comforting dolls to children who have a deployed parent.

On Monday, Nov. 1 at 2 p.m., I will be interviewed on Deborah Shane Metropolis Radio about Over 50 and Out of Work.  Please tune in, listen and join the conversation!

My story from the first AUSA military family forum:

10/26/2010

I’ll be covering the military family forums for the AUSA at its October 25 to 27 annual convention in Washington, DC again this year.

One of my photos, Irish Boats, shot in August 2009 on our family trip to Ireland has been accepted into the Putnam Art Council’s 2010 Fall Juried Show.  Ed Smith,  juror, is a Guggenheim Fellow in sculpture and drawing and director of the art gallery and Venice Bienniale program at Marist College.

Putnam Arts Council Fall Juried Show

October 15 to November 7, 2010

Opening Reception: October 15, 6:00 to 8:00 p.m.

521 Kennicut Hill Road, Mahopac, NY

845-803-8622

In its Sept. 5 issue, New York magazine has an amazing feature story about Waiting for “Superman” called Schools: The Disaster Movie by John Helleman, which everyone should read either before or after seeing the documentary!

The article explores the issues raised by the film and the changes that have occurred in the educational system provoked by reformists such as Geoffrey Canada and Michelle Rhee and promoted by the Obama administration through its Race to the Top initiative.  Maybe there is hope that improvement is coming to our public schools!  Jonathan Alter, Newsweek columnist, said to Dwight and me at the documentary screening that he has seen more educational reform in the past 12 months than in last 20 years.

Dwight and I went to a screening for the documentary Waiting for “Superman” last night at the Paramount Screening Room in Times Square.  The alternatively inspiring and heartbreaking film focuses on five children who are marooned in failing public schools and uses their plight to illustrate the decrepit state of American public education.

The documentary was made by Davis Guggenheim, the Oscar-winning filmmaker (An Inconvenient Truth).  He has partnered with DonorsChoose.org to give viewers an opportunity to do something about the sad state of our public school system.  DonorsChoose.org is a remarkable online charity, founded by Charles Best, that connects donors to classrooms in need.  Our daughter Clare worked as an intern at DonorsChoose.org last summer.

I cannot urge you strongly enough:  Go see the documentary and get involved in the movement to change our public education system, which is not preparing our kids for bright futures in today’s global economy!

Charles Best, founder of DonorsChoose.org, and Jonathan Alter, Newsweek columnist and DonorsChoose board member, at the screening.  I apologize for the lousy picture!